Making Wise Biblical Decisions When Scripture Doesn't Give Clear Answers

Also Available on:

Hello, friends! Today's podcast question says: "Hi Elizabeth, can you give some insight into how we might determine if a choice can be based on wisdom, if it seems unclear if the Bible addresses these choices? Specifically, this is in reference to you mentioning basing a decision on wisdom regarding school choices."

This is a very interesting and important question for us to think through—and an important one for us to help our children think through as we train them in obeying God and making wise choices. This is the question we're going to dive deep into today on the Foundation Worldview Podcast, where we seek to answer your questions so that you can equip the children that God has placed in your care to carefully evaluate every idea they encounter and understand the truth of the biblical worldview.

I'm your host, Elizabeth Urbanowicz, and I'm thrilled that you've joined me for another episode today.

Why We Need Wisdom-Based Decision Making

As we think about training ourselves and our children to make wise choices, this is important because the Bible does not give yes or no answers to every question in life. While there are things that are clearly commanded or forbidden in Scripture, many of the decisions that we need to make on a day-to-day basis are based on wisdom.

I believe there are three important questions to ask ourselves before making any decision:

1. Does the Bible specifically command or forbid anything related to this topic?
2. What general biblical principles apply to this topic?
3. How can I go about making a wise choice regarding this issue?

For the remainder of this podcast, I'm going to model how we can walk through asking and answering these three questions in a decision that we may have to make in our parenting. Then I'm going to model how we can use these three questions to walk our children through making a wise decision for themselves.

Since the question specifically asked about school choice—which I mentioned in a previous podcast as a decision based in wisdom—I'm going to model how we could apply these three questions when making a decision about our children's education.

Question 1: Does the Bible Specifically Command or Forbid Anything Related to This Topic?

Those of you who are very familiar with Scripture know that the Bible does not specifically command any educational setting, and it does not forbid any specific educational setting. However, it does give commands about how we parent and how we instruct our children.

One specific command that I think directly applies to the decision we make in schooling our children is Ephesians 6:4, which says: "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."

In this passage, we are forbidden from provoking our children to anger, and we are commanded to bring up our children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. While this passage does not command or forbid certain forms of education, it does offer guidance in whatever form of education we choose.

What Does "Not Provoking Children to Anger" Mean?

We are forbidden from provoking our children to anger, so the education choice that we make for our children should not be one that provokes them to anger. Now, what I mean by this—I don't mean that our children should always be happy and thrilled about the education choices that we make, but it should not be a choice that causes them such frustration with how they are designed that they're going to naturally fail and be provoked to anger.

Let me share an example: Almost a decade ago, I saw parents very wisely move one of their children out of an educational choice that was leading—or could have led to—their child being provoked to anger.

When I was still in the classroom one year, I had a student, a new third grader from a lovely family. This family had four children and was very passionate about classical education. They strongly believed in the classical model and how it was used to guide children. All four of their children were enrolled in a very strong classical Christian school.

However, one of their daughters had severe learning disabilities. The classical school they attended served mostly very advanced readers. When their daughter was in second grade, she was being asked to read very advanced texts at a fourth or fifth grade reading level—texts that everyone else in the class was able to read. But because of the learning disabilities she struggled with, in second grade she was still reading at a late kindergarten to early first grade reading level.

Her parents saw that she was being greatly frustrated, and that this was not the wisest educational choice for her. So they searched out what would be a better educational option that was not going to lead her to be provoked to anger through frustration. They found the school where I was teaching because we had a wonderful program for children who struggled with learning disabilities that actually sought to retrain their brains to help them overcome some of these learning disabilities.

The Command to Bring Children Up in the Lord

This passage in Ephesians 6 also makes clear that whatever educational setting we choose for our children, this setting should not hinder us from bringing them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

So this is the answer to the first question: The Bible forbids us from provoking our children to anger and commands us to bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Question 2: What General Biblical Principles Apply to This Topic?

Children Are Image Bearers of God

One very clear biblical principle is found right in the first chapter of Genesis. Genesis 1:26-27 says: "Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.' So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them."

This passage makes clear a very general, broad, and important biblical principle: our children are image bearers of the holy God, and they have been designed in a specific way. This means that our children should be in an educational setting where they are treated as image bearers.

Now, this doesn't automatically mean that the Christian school down the block is the best setting for our children, because sadly, even some Christian educators—not many, but some—do not treat children as image bearers of the holy God. But whatever educational setting we do choose for our children, they should be treated with dignity, kindness, and respect because they bear God's image.

Parents Are Called to Teach About God's Ways

Another general biblical principle is found in Deuteronomy 6:4-7: "Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise."

Now this passage of Scripture—this command of how God is to be treated and how we're supposed to teach these things to our children—was given to the nation of Israel living under the Mosaic law. It was not given to new covenant believers. However, from this passage, we can glean the truth that God desires for parents to talk about His ways with their children.

So this is a general biblical principle: Christian parents are to talk about God's ways with their children. Therefore, our children should be in an educational setting where we are not hindered from talking about God's ways with them.

What Could Hinder Us From Talking About God's Ways?

You might be thinking, "Okay, Elizabeth, what kind of setting would hinder me from talking about God's ways with my children?" I think there are two specific ways this could happen:

First, your children could be in an educational setting outside of the home where they're gone so much during the day and they have so much homework in the evening and so many after-school activities that you don't have any time to actually disciple them in your home. You need to make sure that whatever educational setting they're in, it is not eating up so much of your time that you don't have time to disciple your children.

Second, if you're living within the US and you are in a state that is very liberal and has very stringent laws about what parents are and are not allowed to talk about regarding gender and sexuality with their children, that might be a setting where if you send your child to a public school, you could be in danger of potentially losing custody of your child because of the things that you've been teaching them at home.

As I'm recording this podcast—I don't know when this podcast will release, but I'm recording it in April of 2025—just last week a new bill was passed in Colorado which was actually stating that parents would lose custody of their children if they do not affirm the gender of the child's choice. So if you live in a very liberal area of Colorado and your child is in a public school and they could potentially be taken away from you if they share publicly in that education setting, that's an education option that would hinder you from talking with your child about God's ways or would put your child in danger of being taken away from you if you do talk about God's ways with them.

So those are some general biblical principles that we need to keep in mind when we're making educational decisions for our children.

Question 3: How Can I Go About Making a Wise Choice Regarding This Issue?

How can we go about making a wise educational choice for our children?

Pray for Wisdom

I think it begins with praying for wisdom. God has promised us in the first chapter of James that if we lack wisdom, He will give it to us when we ask. We need to pray for that wisdom.

Seek Godly Counsel

It's also important to consult other godly individuals in your life who love you and love your child. I'm sitting potentially thousands of miles away from you in front of my computer, and I do not know you personally. While I can show you and guide you how Scripture offers guidance in this area, I can't tell you what is the best educational setting for your child because I don't know—or at least most of you—I don't know you personally and I don't know your children. So consult other godly individuals in your life who know you and love you and who know and love your child. Talk through the different educational options that you're wrestling with and seek wise counsel.

Ask the Key Question

I think a good question to ask ourselves, no matter what situation you're in, is: "In what educational setting will I best be able to disciple my child?"

For different families, the answer to this question will be different, but I think the answer to this question for your family will do a lot in making clear what the wisest educational decision is for your child.

Modeling This Process for Our Children

I just modeled for us how we can go through those three questions in making a decision based on wisdom in our own lives. Now let's talk through how we can use this same three-step model to walk our children through making a wise decision.

A situation I want to use as an example is helping a child determine how to spend their birthday money. Let's say it was your child's birthday last week or last month, and they got $100 or $150 combined from different people for their birthday. Let's walk our children through these three questions.

Question 1 for Children: What Does the Bible Command or Forbid?

First, we'd say, "Okay, we're going to look: does the Bible specifically command or forbid anything related to this topic? Does it specifically command or forbid anything related to how you spend your birthday money?"

A great passage of Scripture to take our children to is Matthew 6:19-21: "Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

We'd say, "Okay, what does this verse command or forbid?" Well, it forbids us from laying up treasures on earth—which means we're not just supposed to buy tons and tons and tons of stuff and have all our treasures be here—and it commands us to lay up treasures in heaven.

This doesn't exactly tell us how you should or shouldn't spend your birthday money, but it does talk about what the attitude of our hearts should be: that we shouldn't just want more and more and more and more things, but we should be focusing on the things of God.

Question 2 for Children: What Biblical Principles Apply?

For the second question—"What general biblical principles apply to this topic?"—I think there are two passages of Scripture that would be great to take our kids to.

The first one is 2 Corinthians 9:6-7: "Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver."

We'd say, "Okay, what is the general biblical principle in this passage? We're supposed to give generously to God."

Another passage to take our kids to is James 1:16-17: "Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers. Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change."

We'd say, "Okay, what does this have to say about your birthday money? Your birthday money is a gift from whom? It's actually a gift from God." And so this gift from God should be used in ways that honor God.

These passages do not stipulate specifically how your child should spend their birthday money, but they do make clear that your child should give generously to God, and your child should view this money as a gift from God and spend it in ways that honor God.

Now, spending money in ways that honor God can include spending it on things that we enjoy. We can spend our money on things that we enjoy while also having a heart that recognizes that this comes from God.

Question 3 for Children: How to Make a Wise Decision

For the third question—"How can I go about making a wise decision regarding this issue?"—talk with your child about how you're going to pray for wisdom, and pray with your child. Talk about what it looks like to give generously to God. Talk about what portion of this money your child would like to give to God. Give them an opportunity to pray about it and spend some time thinking, and then let them be the one that gives this money. Let them physically bring the money to church and give it. There's a lot of excitement in this—there should be! God loves a cheerful giver, and we want our children to experience this joy and excitement of giving.

Then talk with your child about how he or she wants to spend the money and talk through: "Is this a wise option? Why would this be a wise option for spending the money? Would this not be a wise option? Why or why not?" And then rejoice with them in how they choose to spend it.

Summary: Three Questions for Wise Decision Making

Just as a reminder, we've talked through three basic questions we can ask ourselves and our children anytime we're trying to make a decision:

1. Does the Bible specifically command or forbid anything related to this topic?
2. What general biblical principles apply to this topic?
3. How can I go about making a wise choice regarding this issue?

When we ask and answer these three questions, we can move forward with confidence in the decisions that we are making, recognizing that we're fallen and that we live in a fallen world. So not every decision that we make is going to be perfect. Not every decision we make is going to turn out well, but God uses all of those things for His glory and for our good.

Take Action: Join Our Community

Well, that's a wrap for this episode. If you found this framework for biblical decision-making helpful, I encourage you to join our email community at Foundation Worldview. You'll receive practical resources, biblical insights, and tools like today's three-question framework delivered directly to your inbox. Don't miss out on future content designed to help you confidently guide the children in your care through the complex decisions they'll face in our world.

If you have a question you would like for me to answer on a future Foundation Worldview podcast, you can submit that question by going to foundationworldview.com/podcast.

As we leave our time together, my prayer for you is that no matter the situation in which you and the children God has placed in your care find yourselves, you would trust that God is working all things together for your good by using all things to conform you more into the image of His Son.